26 May 2016
This is the epitome of sexualisation of children. BABIES in sexy swimsuits and bikinis, being taught to pose in a suggestive manner for marketing campaigns.
Everyone has to reject these types of images and marketing if we are ever going to protect our children from sexual abuse.
When you look at these, you might think ‘Oh they’re so cute/trendy/fashionable/awesome!’
But look again: these are babies dressed as sexy women. Because that will sell more teeny, tiny swimsuits.
Second, what kind of sex offender is directing/producing these adverts? You might think these are innocent but look at the body language and the poses of the babies. That wasn’t innocent, that was directed specifically to look as sexy as possible.
Why is this so important?
Sexualisation of children affects everyone.
Girls & Women: It teaches them that the highest status they can be is sexy. It teaches them that looking good and being sexy and cute are the most important things in life. Research has recently found that girls start to self-sexualise from around 6 years old now. This means they see themselves through the male gaze. They look at themselves and assess how pretty or sexy they appear. They imagine what others think of the way they look. They copy sexualised dance moves and body language. They want to wear high heels and try on makeup. It reduces them to an object of sex before they even know what sex is.
I’m talking about padded bras for 9 year olds, knickers that say ‘CUTE’ or ‘GRRR’ across the ass and t-shirts that say ‘I ❤️ BOYS’ or ‘NAUGHTY BUT NICE’ across the chest being sold in mainstream stores.
We have young girls as young as 5 years old copying Twerk dance moves in front of their TV and rolling their bodies with their tshirt looped through neck so it looks like a bikini top. They are moulded into the perfect targets for sexual abuse, domestic abuse and lifelong exploitation of their bodies and sexuality by the media, people around them and marketing strategies.
Teenage girls and women become stuck walking a tightrope of being ‘sexy but not a slut’. The expectation is to look fabulous, wear makeup and heels, wear tight clothing, look sexy and attractive to boys/men and to sleep with boys/men when they ask but don’t look too sexy or wear clothes too tight or sleep with too many boys/men – because then they will be downgraded to a slut. They have breached the twisted norms of the gender role that has been constructed for them and they are now judged and outcast.
Women are positioned as submissive recipients of sex and desire – they should take it as a compliment when a man tries to touch them or rape them – because it means they are so sexy, the man can’t possibly help himself. It causes a life of walking through the streets with your car keys in your hand poking through your fingers, imagining how you would stab a potential attacker in the neck and run away. It’s being told that you should never get a taxi alone, never wear that skirt, don’t wear low cut clothing, don’t get too drunk, don’t go alone to certain places: because you will be used for sex.
Sexual objectification dehumanises women. It dementalises us. A sex object doesn’t have feelings or thoughts or ideas or aspirations. A sex object is just there for sexual pleasure. This is why we still have people that assume rape is just sex and that women and girls can’t be harmed ‘that much’ by experiencing non-consensual sex or sex acts.
Boys and Men: The issue here is that boys are taught that all of the above is normal and acceptable. They see constant images, videos and real life examples that reinforce that girls and women are just potential girlfriends or sex objects. What shape is their body? Are they pretty enough? Are they cute? Are they sexy? What do they wear? Would they fuck them? Are they ‘wifey material?’
Research from NSPCC has shown that over 30% of boys (and girls) in secondary school think it is completely acceptable to copy sex acts from porn in which the women is completely humiliated and degraded by the man. The example given was that the same percentage of children reported that they thought that a boy ejaculating on to their face with their eyes open was the way to ‘finish’ sex.
Boys are taught that being mean to girls means they like them. Boys are shown that girls are there to be looked at. Young men and grown men lead a life in which they catcall women because they think it is acceptable to have a loud opinion on a woman’s body and that they have the right to shout it at them.
Through porn and through their own social sexualisation, boys are taught that gaining sex is the height of their worth. Have you lost your V yet? How many girls have you done it with? Have you ever done anal to a girl? Did she let you cum on her tits? Did you fuck her and chuck her? The girl or woman is always positioned as a mere receiver of these acts – as holes to be filled. The objectification and dehumanisation of women and girls from such an early age reinforces the power imbalance between male and female in society. Boys are taught to be emotionless, strong, powerful, smart and logical – whilst they recognise girls as sexy, cute, polite, ditzy and emotional.
There is also a very important impact on boys and men that is hidden until something bad happens to them, too. Sexual violence can happen to anyone – but the sexualisation of girls and boys teaches that girls are the objects of sex and boys and the subjects of sex. So when a boy or man is sexually abused, they are significantly less likely to ever disclose to anyone – mainly because it breaches their own gendered norms in sex. There are also extra issues surrounding judgement from family and friends that they are gay, that they were too weak to fight off their abuser and that they are not really a ‘real man’ if they were abused. It teaches boys and men that sexual violence is a female issue because contrary to the rhetoric – what they are really being taught is that the root causes of sexual violence are the women and girls themselves: their behaviours, their clothes, their sexuality, their bodies.
At worst, men (statistically) grow to be the largest population of sex offenders, paedophiles and traffickers in the world. At best, they grow up with a socially supportive entitlement to sex and sexual power that means that they often breach those boundaries of consent and respect for women because they don’t even know they are there. Recent research has shown that men only realised that a woman wasn’t interested in them once she had physically hit them or screamed. When women said no to sexual advances, ignored them, told them to back off, looked away, started to cry, froze or gently pushed them away – they continued to try to have sex with her. In addition, men consistently show higher levels of rape myth acceptance in which they agree with statements such as ‘most women lie about rape’, ‘when a woman says no, she doesn’t really mean it’ and ‘women enjoy being raped’ (Sleath, 2012).
Why would we expect boys and men to treat girls and women with respect when it is us (the grown ups of the world) who are feeding them these messages about their gender and their roles in sex?
The babies in the sexy swimsuits are just the beginning of this horrifying process of sexualisation that underpins all sexual and domestic abuse, trafficking and exploitation.
The link I am making from early and continued sexualisation to sexual abuse and rape is two told:
1. We are creating sex offenders.
Perps that are moving through their own process of desensitisation, denial and acceptance of their sexual preferences towards rape or assault or children etc. are watching these same adverts, same videos, same films and shows. They are being taught that women love being catcalled, that girls are sexy before the age of consent, that forced sex is acceptable and even enjoyed by women. Society created sex offenders. We can try to place the problem within their brains all we like (mainly because this makes us feel safer and better about ourselves if we can pinpoint what is ‘wrong’ with a sex offender) – but we must not ignore the thousands of messages of sex and sexualisation that are pumped out every moment of every day. Many sex offenders when questioned don’t believe they did anything wrong. And we wonder why.
2. Sexualisation of children and women normalises victimisation.
If children are growing up being sexualised from babies, when an adult starts showing them sexual attention or sexually exploiting them as a child, they will not see that as dangerous or scary or abusive, they will see it as copying what they see on TV or in their idols music videos. When someone tells a 5 year old that they look ‘sexy’ we should all be horrified and yet that comment is usually met with delight from the child and ‘aww’s’ from the other adults.
Why would a child delight in being called sexy? Because as taught them that it was positive.
Children who are already hypersexualised will already believe that their worth is based on sex appeal and sexual performance – so when a perpetrator starts showing them porn or performing sex acts on them and telling them that they are special and sexy – it provides/increases the self worth based on sex due to the social sexualisation they have experienced since birth. Social sexualisation that WE caused. As adults. As adult society.
Babies posing in sexy swimsuits are just the beginning. And to the parents of these babies, I say this:
If the photographer or director of these shoots thinks that dressing your baby in sexy swimsuits and having them pose in sexually suggestive manners is perfectly acceptable, imagine the things they are going to be ask your child to do at 5 years old, 15 years old and 18 years old. Think about what you are teaching your babies – before they can even spell their own name, they are being sexually exploited for their female form. You must protect them from this industry and stop images like this from being made. They cannot make these images if you are not giving consent.
To the photographers and fashion designers:
Check yourselves. You know this is wrong. Babies don’t need lingerie and bikinis. Babies don’t want or need to be sexy. What is wrong with you, that you think this is normal?
And if you don’t think this is normal, but you’re doing it anyway because it will get lots of likes or it will make you lots of money – you’re even worse, frankly.
We all have a duty to protect children. Even you.
Date: 26 May 2016